When I was a hospital chaplain I listened in on a conversation one day about a pastor who had come to visit one of his parishioners. The conversation was between the Director of Pastoral Care at the Hospital and a nurse. I don’t remember how the nurse had noticed the pastor’s presence in the unit, but she was upset that the patient and family were more emotionally distraught after the visit than they were before. It was not that the pastor said something harmful or rude during the visit. It wasn’t even that the pastor was honest about a health condition that the patient and family were avoiding facing. The problem with the pastor’s visit was that he was cold, unattached, and uncaring for the patient and family. He may have said all of the right words, and he probably offered a prayer at the end of the visit. He simply acted like he didn’t care. At the end of the conversation the Director of Pastoral Care told the nurse that this man was really not a pastor, he was a pastoral clinician.
I’ve never forgotten the phrase “pastoral clinician.” It connotes a person who has all of the education, experience, and external qualifications to be a pastor but does not have a heart that cares for people. There are many things that can be learned in a seminary classroom, and experience teaches us a lot. But I don’t know if any amount of education or experience can teach a man or a woman to care for people.
As your pastor, I care about you deeply. My care for the members of our church family is not out of obligation or responsibility, but is based in my love and the place each member of our church family has in my heart. I do not watch someone’s joy or sorrow and stand by unaffected. My heart rejoices when yours rejoices, and my heart breaks when yours is breaking.
I care about you…when you face health challenges,
I care about you…when your family is in conflict,
I care about you…when you are away from church,
I care about you…when someone close to you has died.
I care about you…when someone has hurt you,
I care about you…when you are discouraged,
I care about you…when you are waiting anxiously for news that could be good or bad.
I care about you…when you take a step forward in faith,
I care about you…when you watch your child who has grown up leave for the first time.
I care about you…when you fall in love and are married,
I care about you…when you are scared to death because a new baby has come to your house.
I care about you…when you question your faith,
I care about you…when you’ve done about all you can do and have to give it to God.
Speaking honestly, I’m a little embarrassed that tears come to my eyes as quickly as they do. It is not that I’m an over-emotional person. I also understand that pastors must guard against becoming overly-emotional so that a person who is in need feels that they must care for the pastor instead of the pastor caring for them. But the tears that come to my eyes remind me that I am not a “pastoral clinician.” I am a pastor, and I count it a gift that I care for each member of our church family. It is not something that I have to “work on,” and it is not something that I had to decide to do. I simply do. Know this: you are cared for by your pastor.