John the Evangelist doesn’t say that Jesus danced at the wedding feast at Cana, but if Jesus had been at the wedding I officiated that Friday night years ago, I’m fairly confident he would have found his way to the dance floor. Clarke’s Old Time Music Center was a bluegrass music venue/dance hall nestled in the Shenandoah Valley just south of Waynesboro in the community of Raphine, and it is where two music lovers met on a Friday night many years ago. It was in this unique place that was called the sawmill by those who were familiar with it that a bluegrass band played each Friday night to a couple of hundred locals who were transported to another time by the acoustic instruments and songs that grew out of the mountains of the Southeastern United States.
Martha and Lester met at the Sawmill, so it was their desire to have their wedding in that same place. I was told that it would be unlike any other wedding I had ever done, and the couple were right. There was no definite time that the wedding was to take place, it would probably start around 8:30, but that depended on when the band would take their break. Other than a granddaughter who served as a flower girl, there were no attendants. There was no rehearsal, no rehearsal dinner, and no posed photographs prior to the ceremony. Without a formal reception, rented tuxes, a bridal gown, bridesmaid’s dresses, and a rehearsal dinner, the budget was small compared to nearly all other weddings I have ever officiated. The focus of this wedding was not the ceremony but the relationship, not pomp and formality but the importance of being surrounded by friends and community as two people made a solemn promise before God to one another.
In a culture in which many couples are focused more on the details of the ceremony (or the party after the ceremony) than the marriage, this wedding was a refreshing experience. Often it feels like the minister has one job on the wedding day: don’t do anything to distract from image of a perfect wedding as pictured in magazines and social media posts. It often feels like a minister is simply rented for a service, just like a caterer or photographer, a necessary player in a pageant that has more to do with fantasy than a life-long commitment. In a culture in which many Christians make angry accusations about people who are going to “destroy the biblical definition of marriage,” that wedding on that Friday night years ago was a living example of how a broken practice and undesirable expectations may begin to be corrected.
Nearly everyone danced that night. The bride and the groom danced. Young children danced. Sr. adults danced. Even the preacher danced. I must admit that I was surprised when I was approached by a lady who offered me a strong but tacit invitation to step onto the dance floor. As we danced she was shocked to learn that I was the pastor and I was shocked to learn that she was 87, but that didn’t stop our two-step to that bluegrass band. Dancing with the Stars it was not, but when a person finds someone they can share their life with, decide that the marriage is more important than the ceremony, and make their vows before God surrounded by close friends in and old sawmill in the Shenandoah Valley, I don’t know anything to do but dance.